Uncertainty is one of our bigger stressors. Waiting for an important call to come through. Watching the calendar march onward after a job interview. Watching someone in a leadership role take a wrong step.
Time is another of these stressors that doesn’t bend to our will.
For as long as I’ve been aware of the passage of time, it has always freely flowed, defying all attempts to control it. When I try to corral it into blocks of time, it leaks around the edges and finds its own level.
Time is resistant to my commands to stay still or to behave itself during a busy day, slowing down or speeding up at its own whimsy.
The more I focus on time, the less responsive it is to my requests. So, when possible, I ignore it.
I ride alongside time and feel its pull on me and my day, but I step back from my efforts to claim it, carve it into little chunks, or put a pin in it at any given moment.
There are calendar alerts and iPhone alarms that do this for me.
Once I unattach myself from time for a bit, I can stop fighting it and be more present, noticing the light traversing the curtains, marking the passage of time through the morning without the pressure of counting the minutes as they pass by.
I can just breathe and be.
I’m here at this moment, and the next, and the next, feeling the stress slip away, increasing my effective use of time by letting it go.